Asking for Help is NOT a Sign of Weakness.

 

My Hot & Hunky Hubz was a gear-head.
Restoring old cars was therapeutic for Jay.

Girls, our garage looked like an auto repair shop!
Big tool chests lined the back wall.
Wrenches and widgets hung on pegboard wall to wall.
Shelves and shelves of solvents and solutions were propped up by
decades worth of car magazines and manuals.
A fat red compressor as tall as me hissed and clicked next to
huge welders accessorized by heavy metal masks and thick gloves.
There was a sandblasting stall that doubled as a painting bay.
Jay reserved one stall inside his precious space to park my car but

the rest of the building was all man cave. 

One day, shortly after Hot & Hunky died,
my car wouldn’t start.

Naturally, I called a tow truck.
After a short wait, a big truck backed up the driveway.

Beep… Beep… Beep… 

Out jumped a Burly Man.
“Thanks for coming so quickly. My car is in the garage and it won’t start.”

“Ok, Lady, let’s have a look,”
said Burly Man as we walked toward the garage.

When I swung open the garage door, Burly Man stopped in his tracks.

“Is this a joke, Lady?” he asked as he looked around.

“No! The car really… won’t … start ….”

Then I saw what he saw.  

Floor to ceiling automotive tools.
Everything I needed to start my car was right there,
but I didn’t know how to use them!

I was stuck!

I blushed, shrugged my shoulders and smiled weakly.
He went to work and had my car purring in minutes.
(I had left the dome light on and just needed a jumpstart.)
He was still shaking his head and muttering as he left.

I’ve been stuck lots of times.

Out of gas.

Out of money.

Out of time.

Out of patience.

Out of my comfort zone.

Out of my league.

Out of God’s will.

Girlfriend, I have learned an
important lesson.

I have learned to ask for help.

Even if it’s awkward.
Even if it’s embarrassing.
Even if it’s humbling.
I ask for help.

Do you?
Do you ask for help?

Sounds so easy, but ugh, who wants to do it?
Wouldn’t you rather be the one who comes to the rescue?
The one who
drops off the meal or
writes the check or
offers the good advice.

Yeah, me too.
But sometimes we’re the ones who need the help.

That’s the time to 
call in reinforcements. 

Someone who will talk you out of the tree you’re in or
pray for you like your life depends on it or 

help you brainstorm a strategy of transformation.

As hard as it is to admit I’m not superwoman,
here’s what I’ve discovered about asking for help.

1.

Asking for help shrinks the problem – just by speaking it aloud.
When the only voice in my head is my own, fear and worry multiply.
When you talk about how you’re stuck, the issue usually shrinks. 

2.

Asking for help puts more than one brain, back, and pair of hands on the problem.
When I ask for help to get unstuck, I always get several suggestions I hadn’t thought of.
The weight and the work of the “stuck” is handled more easily when I have help.

3.

Asking for help honors the person I ask to help me.

When I ask someone to teach me how to do something, I’m saying,
“Hey, you’re really good at this!”

When I ask someone to advise me, I’m saying,
“You’re wise or smart!”

When I ask someone to hold me accountable, I’m saying,
“You’re strong and I trust you!”

When I ask someone to pray for me, I’m saying,
“You have won my confidence and I believe you hear from God.”

It’s a win – win for everyone.

I get the help, support, advice and prayer I need and
my helpers get edified, complimented and honored at the same time.

Don’t get schnookered by our enemy into thinking you’re alone in your stuckness!

Asking for help is not a sign of weakness!
It’s wisdom.

Scripture Refresher: Two are better than one,
because they have a good return for their labor:
If either of them falls down,one can help the other up.
But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up.
Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm.
But how can one keep warm alone?
Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves.
A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.
Ecclesiastes 4:9-12 (NIV)

Prayer: Father, You did not create us to do this life alone. Help me to ask for help as easily as I offer help to others. Remind me that I need not be alone and you have put sisters in Christ in my life to be the extra hands and feet when I cannot do it myself.  Amen

What have you learned about asking for help?
Leave a comment below and I’ll personally respond to it.