What Confession Is Good for Your Soul?
Sin is sneaky!
My son, Eli and I were at the Krispy Kreme drive-though, coupon in hand. We were moments away from warm, frosted donuts, but something was wrong with the coupon I was trying to use. I wanted chocolate frosted but the coupon was for glazed. I put up quite a fuss to get my donuts at a discount and succeeded.
Pulling away victorious, donuts in hand, my boy looked at me and said, “Mom, you were really mean to that lady.”
OUCH! I sure was.
“Son, you are so right. Will you forgive me for talking to her like that?”
“Sure, mama, … can I have a donut?”
As he ate his circle of deliciousness, I silently asked God to forgive me for modeling behavior I would never tolerate from the young man next to me. I thought that was done, but Holy Spirit laid his hand on my heart, prompting me to return and apologize to the girl at the Krispy Kreme.
With the store already disappearing in my rear view mirror and using the traffic zipping by at breakneck speeds, I justified why I couldn’t go back.
Holy Spirit wasn’t having any of it. For three days, He kept the pressure on till I couldn’t stand it anymore.
Correcting Your Failures
Back at the Krispy Kreme, I asked for Rose. She came from her position at the drive-through window to greet me at the counter.
“Hi,” I said as friendly as I could. “I went to the drive-through three days ago and was very rude to you. I came to say I was sorry.”
She looked at me for a split second and said, “I don’t remember you.”
Taken aback, but committed to making amends, I said, “Well, I remember you, and I have come back to apologize.”
“Ok, is that all you need from me?” she asked.
Awkwardly, I said, “Well, yes, I am sorry. I shouldn’t have talked to you like that. Will you forgive me?”
She responded with, “It don’t matter.”
Out of my mouth pops, “It does matter. My God loves you too much to let me talk to you that way.”
I would love to tell you that God broke through and she cried, and I cried, and she surrendered her life to Jesus, but that isn’t what happened. She looked at me like I was an alien, then said with an attitude of indifference, “Whatever!” As I stood there stunned, she turned on her heel and went back to her position at the window.
Learning the lesson painfully.
What in the world? God, why would you drag me back here to be humiliated and embarrassed if you weren’t going to use this for your glory?
Ever been in that spot? You do the right thing but get the wrong result?
As you have probably guessed, Holy Spirit pressuring me to go back and apologize wasn’t about Rose or her salvation. While I might have planted a seed on her journey of faith, it was all about me learning to keep a clean slate with God.
When we let even small sins start to accumulate, they create a chasm between us and God. Shame mounts and we are less and less inclined to approach God for advice, direction, or affirmation. As time passes, we get used to bearing a burden of guilt that God never meant for us to carry.
If you feel weighted down today by an error in judgement or flaw of character, won’t you confess it to God and receive his forgiveness? If you feel Holy Spirit nudging you, don’t wait any longer. Confess it to him, (1John1:9) and to one another and be healed (James 5:16).
How does God get your attention or redirect you back to him? Leave me a comment below.
Prayer
Prayer: Father, I confess that I carry things that you never meant for me to shoulder. Lead me to offer those things to you so my burden is light again. Give me the courage to do what you ask of me for my own good and your glory. In Jesus Name. amen.
When I’m wondering and worrying about whether or not I’m at fault in a situation, I seem to get little signs from God pushing me in the right direction. For instance, my friend of 43 years (Peggy) chose to believe her alcoholic daughter rather than me back in September. She told her mother I had said something “bad” about her father – which I never had. This is a 44 year old woman who has been estranged from her father for 20 years! Still, her story was a total fabrication. I was angry that she had lied, but even more angry that Peggy had believed her instead of me. I cut off all communication with both of them. It has haunted me daily. In the past month, my phone has rung several times with “Peggy” as the caller. When I answer, no one is there. In addition, I recently met a woman who told me (from out of nowhere!) that she’d lost touch with her best friend 10 years ago, and when she tried to call her, she had passed away. I think God is telling me to contact Peggy.
Seems like God is leading you to contact your friend. I pray that she is listening to the Holy Spirit as well as you are. 🙂
Powerful…thank you!
Hi Robyn,
Yes! I love this! The term i learned for this phenomenon is ‘Stay current,’ don’t let the garbage pile up, quit pushing against the Holy Spirit Who is fighting for me to keep my testimony for Him pure! I spent money to see a stupid movie Saturday night. I wasn’t rude to anyone. In fact I was quite pleasant to the popcorn girl who kept yelling my husbands phone number back to him (into the crowded lobby) (he’s very protective of his private information) (that’s why he spends so much time online finding deals to swift us through lines) (has all of the ‘deal’ info on the phone but sometimes it doesn’t pop right up) (and she needs that info for us to get the ‘deal’ on our popcorn in the ‘elite’ line or whatever they call it). So, I’m really sorry that I spent money on a poor movie and I’m sorry I keep making fun of my husband and the popcorn girl. I will stop now. Have a great day!
Hey Sara,
Glad to know I’m not the only one … 🙂
Have a wonderful day.
I don’t know why but I just got extremely emotional reading this. It is making me cry. I think you are totally right and there have been times I can feel what God is leading me to do and I excuse it somehow saying he must not really want me to say something… I’ll just pray silently for whichever person but you are so right…. We need to go where the spirit leads us and say what is lying on our hearts even if others look at us like aliens bc we are! This is not our eternal home and if we don’t share the gospel and what God is doing in our lives we can not plant seeds in others as well as we can not water our own plant that is meant to bear fruit. It allows us to let the Devil dry out our plants and leaves us feeling a little withered inside. Thank you for sharing this message that I was needing to hear today. God bless girl!!!
I don’t know why but I just got pretty emotional reading this. It is making me cry. I think you are totally right and there have been times I can feel what God is leading me to do and I excuse it somehow saying he must not really want me to say something… I’ll just pray silently for whichever person but you are so right…. We need to go where the spirit leads us and say what is lying on our hearts even if others look at us like aliens bc we are! This is not our eternal home and if we don’t share the gospel and what God is doing in our lives we can not plant seeds in others as well as we can not water our own plant that is meant to bear fruit. It allows us to let the Devil dry out our plants and leaves us feeling a little withered inside. Thank you for sharing this message that I was needing to hear today.
Love your transparency here, Robyn! And Yes! That has happened to me. We stand there feeling stupid, wondering what in the world He was thinking. But he’s always thinking…and always has a purpose for us! Way to follow! You’re such an inspiration!
Hey, we, too, had some awesome Krispy Kreme donuts while we were in Florida. My husband got the filled ones…oh,Dang! Sure love those things!
Hi Robyn,
As I read your doughnut story, I think of several of my own. In most of the cases, as I was making the blunder by not doing what God asked me to do, God was talking to me and telling me what I needed to do next and I was arguing with God about why I couldn’t do what He was asking me to do. I’ve learned if I want sleep at night, then just do what God asks you to do right away. Most of the time I would hear the person say, “I’ve been thinking about doing that.” On one particular day, God asked me to tell a guy who had defeated death on many occasions that maybe the reason why he kept bouncing back was because God was waiting for the man to give his heart to Jesus. Over the years, I’ve talked to him about Jesus but he refused to accept Him as his Savior. I kept waiting for the opportune time to give God’s message, but there never seemed to be one and I knew this man wouldn’t live much longer. So I worked up my nerve and told the man what God prompted me to tell him. I just knew this would be the day the man accepted Christ. Instead, I was yelled at by the man who ranted and raved for 15 minutes as he refused to accept Jesus. I wanted to cry but didn’t. Later, I asked God why did He have me tell the man if he wasn’t going to accept Christ. God told me that He wanted my obedience of giving the message so this man had a chance to accept Christ before he died. I don’t know if the man ever accepted Christ but he died about 6 months later and I know I would have felt horrible if I failed to follow God’s leading.
Maybe God is working on this young lady’s heart and by hearing you, a Christian, apologize then she will begin to desire what you have and will choose to become a Christian after seeing Christians don’t have it all together, but they are willing to go out of their way to apologize for behaving badly. She may be putting on a front not wanting anyone to know how precious your words were to her as she goes to the bathroom to cry because your kind words touched her heart but she can’t let her coworkers know she’s not as tough as she appeared.
Christina,
Thank you for writing. Great insight. I never thought about whether she put on a front and agree with your idea that a seed was planted and may be growing.