How Do You Measure Up To Perfection?
Do you miss the mark of perfection?
I tease my friend Dee about her PPS – Pre Party Syndrome. She obsesses over every detail, but her parties are awesome and everyone wants to be invited to them because her home is beautiful, her food is delicious, her games are fun and her hospitality is over the top. Occasionally, she allows guests to contribute which is how I ended up with the assignment to bring my specialty – deviled eggs.
On the day of the party, my boiled eggs did not want cooperate with me. The shells stuck to the egg white like they’d been super-glued. Big hunks of egg came off with the shells leaving me with the ugliest looking things I’d seen since I tried to cut my own hair.
A Big Decision
I looked at those pitiful eggs and had a decision to make. Take ugly eggs to the party or take nothing. Everything in me wanted to trash the eggs and start over, but there was no time! The voice in my head chided, You can’t take those! They look awful! They are not worthy of a Dee party. She will be offended if you take them. No one will eat them anywat. Maybe you should stay home if that’s the best you can do!
Why is it so easy to let a little thing like ugly eggs undermine my value and make me believe my community will reject me – not my eggs, but me!?
The Dis-Ease of Perfectionism
Because I’m a recovering perfectionist and I relapse into old thinking. It doesn’t just happen with deviled eggs. It can happen with anything!
- My hair.
- My husband.
- My house.
- My kids.
- My car.
- My closet.
- My work.
- My writing.
- My weight.
- You name it!
Do you do that? Assume that if you’re not perfect or your kids aren’t perfect or if your marriage, spelling, driving or deviled eggs aren’t perfect that you’re a failure and therefore unacceptable?
Ooooh, I used to LIVE that lie all the time! So easy to slip into. You look around and everyone else seems to have it together. Especially, if you have a couple of over achievers in your life who really set the standard high.
Ugh! How do you measure up?
The answer is … you don’t.
One way to overcome the tyranny of perfectionism is to STOP measuring yourself against what you think you see in other people. Stop COMPARING.
God loves you just the way you are. Really. He does. He even says so in His book. God loves you with an everlasting love. Jer. 31:3
He loves you so much, he sacrificed his son, Jesus, to pay for your sins so you could establish an unhindered relationship with him.
- No conditions
- No catches.
- No exclusions.
- No performance required.
No one is perfect
I don’t know how the lie that you have to be perfect got stuck in your head, but here’s the truth. No one is perfect. No one. Ever. Except Jesus. And even He doesn’t expect you to meet that standard.
Today, stop comparing, start smiling and step into believing God loves and accepts you just as you are.
I want you to know, I whacked those ugly boiled eggs in half, stuffed them with filling and they were delicious! At the party, they disappeared faster than kids at chore time.
Replace the negative trash talk in your head with the truth of God’s thoughts toward you. I’d love to hear how you overcome the tyranny of perfection. How do let yourself be perfectly imperfect?
Prayer: Lord, remind me that you love me as is. No conditions or catches. Remind me that you made me and as my Creator, you love, admire and approve of your good work and so should I. In Jesus Name, amen.
Robyn,
It took me a long time to realize that I can not be perfect. I tried so hard. It took a while for me to realize that I wasn’t made that way & that I could only be the best that I could be with flaws & that helped me have a closer relationship to my God & helped me to learn to give it to him.
Robyn,
This is not about perfection or lack thereof. I just decided it was time to let you know how much I am appreciating your homespun wisdom in such relatable terms. And, I might add, there is a depth of richness and Godliness that is blessing my soul.
We met at a women’s retreat a few years ago. We prayed together concerning my granddaughter who has since been delivered from the darkness of drugs and it’s lifestyle into Christ’s kingdom of Light! Her life is a testimony to God’s mercy and the power of prayer!! Thank you.
May Jesus continue to bless you and your ministry, Linda
That is AWESOME! Thanks for the good report. You made my day!
Honestly, I have not overcome this yet. I am extremely hard on myself. I allow so many little things to cause me to feel inadequate. It something I must keep working at.
Hey Sarah,
I write about it cuz I’m still a work in progress, too. You’ll be hearing (reading) more about being perfectly imperfect. Thanks for writing and being so honest.
WIP – Work in Progress – Thank goodness God accepts us where we are, whatever dark corner of self doubt, self pity and self loathing we find ourselves in. Life is short. Life is hard. It is okay to fail at things. Fail at housework, failed meals, failed DEVIL EGGS! God’s love sees the heart and the intent, not the actual product! Thank you Robyn, I do enjoy your blogs!
Hi Robyn,
Thank you for sharing this with us. I really needed to read this today. I know that I compare myself with others a lot and now I just need to remember that God loves me just the way I am. I heard you talk in Sedona, Az last month and I really enjoyed it, still reading your book too.
Yes this is me most of the time .i wont ask people to my house because i think it is not good enough or clean enough. I wish i wasnt like this.
Hi Kaye
Thanks so much for writing and being so honest. You need to know you are not alone. And, that serving dinner on paper plates is okay!