The Tyranny of Perfectionism
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Today’s devotional comes right out of the Flourishing in Your Faith book.
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An “egg-xample” of perfectionism
I tease my friend Dee about her PPS—pre-party syndrome. She obsesses over every detail. Her parties are awesome. Everyone wants to be invited to them because her home is beautiful, her food is delicious, her games are fun, and her hospitality is over the top.
Occasionally, she allows guests to contribute, which is how I ended up with the assignment to bring my specialty, deviled eggs.
On the day of the party, my boiled eggs did not want to cooperate with me. The shells stuck to the egg white as if they’d been superglued. Big hunks of egg came off with the shells, leaving me with the ugliest looking things I’d seen since I tried to cut my own hair.
I looked at those pitiful eggs and had a decision to make.
Take ugly eggs to the party or take nothing. Everything in me wanted to trash the eggs and start over, but I didn’t have enough time!
The voice in my head chided, You can’t take those! They look awful! They are not worthy of a Dee party. She will be offended if you take them. No one will eat them anyway. Maybe you should stay home if that’s the best you can do.
Old thinking habits die hard
Why is it so easy to let a little thing like ugly eggs undermine my value and make me believe my community will reject me?
(Not reject my eggs but reject me!)
Because I’m a recovering perfectionist.
If I’m not careful, too easily I relapse into old thinking.
It doesn’t just happen with deviled eggs. It can happen with anything!
- My hair.
- My husband.
- My house.
- My kids.
- My car.
- My closet.
- My work.
- My writing.
- My weight.
You name it!
What about you?
Do you do that? Assume that if you’re not perfect or your kids aren’t perfect or if your marriage, spelling, driving, or deviled eggs aren’t perfect, then you are a failure and therefore unacceptable?
What an easy lie to slip into. You look around and everyone else seems to have it together.
Ugh! How do you measure up?
The answer is . . . you don’t.
One way to overcome the tyranny of perfectionism is to stop measuring yourself against what you think you see in other people.
Stop comparing. You don’t need to because God loves you just the way you are. Really. He does.
He even says so in his book: “I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with unfailing kindness” (Jeremiah 31:3).
He loves us so much, he sacrificed his Son, Jesus, to pay for our sins so we could establish an unhindered relationship with him.
No conditions, no catches, no exclusions, no performance required.
Preach truth to your soul
I don’t know how the lie that we have to be perfect got stuck in our heads, but here’s the truth: no one is perfect. No one. Ever. Except Jesus.
So today, let’s stop comparing, start smiling, and step into believing God loves and accepts us just as we are.
How are you battling the tyranny of perfectionism? Leave me a comment— I’d love to pray for you!
Verse
“I cried out, ‘I am slipping!’ but your unfailing love, O Lord, supported me. When doubts filled my mind, your comfort gave me renewed hope and cheer.”
—Psalm 94:18–19
Prayer
Lord, remind me that you love me as is. No conditions or catches. Remind me that you made me, and as my Creator, you love, admire, and approve of your good work, and so should I. In Jesus’ name, amen.
Oh Robyn this is me. I grew up with a narcissistic mother, who also was a perfectionist. Growing up, I was never perfect enough. In her eyes, I couldn’t do anything right. Now at 61 and not communicating with her me me mind for a good 14 years, So much better. I still find myself trying to be perfect. I know I’m not, no one is except Jesus. Thank you for being you. I truly love who God created.
Oh boy, this resonates with me! A great reminder to step back and look at what really matters. Thank you!!! Also, speaking of eggs, I read that adding a heaping (whatever that is) of baking soda to the water when boiling eggs will make it so the shells peel off like magic. We love deviled eggs too and have had some pretty ugly ones too!